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Comfort women overcome their suffering by easing others’ pain

Kim Bok-dong (left) and Kil Won-ok attend a rally in front of the Japanese Embassy in Seoul on May 29. (Yonhap News)

Koreans donate to women victimized by sex crimes during Vietnam War

Two Korean former sex slaves during the Japanese colonial era are raising funds to support other victims of wartime sexual violence around the world.

The so-called Butterfly Fund was formed by 87-year-old Kim Bok-dong and 84-year-old Kil Won-ok to support female victims of the Vietnam War and civil wars in Africa, the Korean Council for Women Drafted for Military Sexual Slavery by Japan said Monday. 

The fund sent $6,000 and $4,000 to 43-year-old Euguyen Ban Luang and 43-year-old Euguyen Ti Kim, respectively, last month. The sisters were victims of sexual violence committed during the Vietnam War. Their mother conceived them when she was raped by a Korean soldier.

When the Vietnam War broke out in 1965, former president Park Chung-hee sent more than 300,000 soldiers to support the U.S. military there. In regards to the suffering the deployment caused, former presidents Kim Dae-jung and Roh Moo-hyun made official apologies to Vietnam.

“The Vietnamese suffered the same pain as us. This is the first step to compensate them,” the group said.

Most Vietnamese women who were sexually violated by Korean soldiers during the war were unable to maintain a normal marriage, according to a field study conducted by the council. Their children also had lower levels of income and education.

“I experienced that pain. I know all too well how much suffering that causes,” said Kil Won-ok, who was forcibly taken by the Japanese invading army at the age of 13.

“I want to comfort women who went through the same ordeal as I did,” Kil said, explaining why she established Butterfly Fund.

Prior to receiving the fund, Luang worked as a day laborer catching shrimps. Now Luang can lease a plot of land for 30 years to farm. Kim, who lives in Hanoi, will rent a building to run a store.

Originally, the Butterfly Fund was to use financial compensation from Japan, but the Japanese government refused to provide any compensation for the wartime atrocities it committed against women during World War II. Singer Lee Hyori donated 5 million won ($4,420) as the fund’s first campaigner, and 300 organizations joined in the effort to amass over 70 million won.

“Our ladies dream of a peaceful world,” said a spokesperson of the council. “We will see to it that the funds are given to those who need them the most.”

By Lee Sang-ju

(Source: paradelle)

So, the past two weeks, I’ve tried my hand at dating. Turns out, I suck at it. I find it extremely hard to be interested in the personal lives of people in general. It’s even harder when it’s someone I have no other connection to.

What happened was that a guy asked me for my number as I was waiting to cross the street. Usually, I ignore such people and requests. But he seemed like a decent person. Fuck it. Who am I kidding. He was tall and decent-looking. Moreover, I found his straightforward attitude and request to go out for a cup of coffee attractive.

He called two days later to meet up for coffee. He said he’d pick me up but since I’d rather not let strangers know where I live, I told him I’d meet him at a landmark nearby. We went to a coffeeshop. Within ten minutes of the conversation, I realized it would be a three month long thing at the most. A play at a relationship, nothing more. And at my age, it wasn’t something I find worth standing stupidity for.

For that was my dealbreaker. He had everything going. The looks, the height, the money, family background, etc. And I tried. Three times. Three dates. Only because he didn’t ask me for anything beyond coffee on the first date. But if I find myself raising an eyebrow every time a person opens his mouth, then there’s definitely a problem. I don’t give a damn if you drive a Benz. If you don’t see a problem with Olympus Has Fallen or understand my frustration with it(which by the way was a completely different issue from the fact that North Koreans were the villains) when I explain after you made me watch it, there is no point in continuing dating. I can forgive many many faults, but I cannot stand willful ignorance. Then there was the fact that the only thing he seemed interested in me was my looks.

The thing is, this seems to be a pattern with dating random people with me. Not just those who ask for my number, but those that friends of friends tried to set me up with. They were very well off, good-looking, cars, house, etc. But all fell short in the brain department.

I’ve heard guys, online and in real life, complain about how girls do 먹튀(dine and run) on blind dates. That they always order really expensive food, wine, etc. and then run off and never contact you again after the first date. Well, you know what? I guess I am one of those girls. Or at least, I probably am to those only first date guys. I once was set up with a guy. He worked at Samsung and his father was a high-ranking government official. I guess he was well off. He showed up driving some kind of Porsche. He asked me what I wanted to eat for dinner. I told him I didn’t care what as long as it was good. He then drove to a fancy-ass restaurant. After choosing the dishes he also proceeded to order a bottle of wine. All in all, the whole dinner, which was mediocre at best, probably cost several hundred dollars. That was our first and final date. While we were recanting our past histories, I mentioned growing up in the Deep South. He seemed shocked. He asked me if I wasn’t scared living there. I said, “No, why would it?” He answered because of all the black people. I thought he must mean something else. There was no way he said what I thought he said. “Uh.. They’re just people.” He then told me how it wasn’t so bad up in Boston because there weren’t so many so he didn’t have to meet many. But when he was accompanying his father on a business trip to Atlanta, there were so many black people around that he just stayed in the hotel room the whole two weeks. And that was the end of that.

The older I get, the more prickly and intolerant I find myself becoming towards random men. Things I used to ignore for politeness sake I do not. It’s no surprise I’ve only had three relationships in the past, four including The Friend, and they all started out as friends first. I wonder why it is that only such people seem to find me attractive. What’s wrong with me? Is there something about me that screams 된장녀(material girl)? I don’t even have a knock-off Louis Vuitton. This has been a long and rambling post about my frustrations dating in general. It’s overrated. And I give up.

One good thing came out of kpop girl groups.

Wearing short shorts and mini-dresses in public became socially acceptable. I no longer have to choose between being the social pariah or melting between fabrics in the summer.

Talleyrand once said that “When what a woman reveals is beautiful, it is an affront to decent society. When it is ugly, it is very very ugly indeed.” Though he was an crippled aristocrat who had numerous mistresses in spite of being a bishop of the Catholic Church, was excommunicated and married his then-mistress, adopted his nephew and called him up to Paris, made the nephew’s wife his mistress, whose mother he also had relations with; these words he spoke to his niece in public, his daughter in real life, might hold some truth to it. But pooh to all that. In this sweltering weather, it’s practicality over decorum for me.

Besides. Did he not also say “There is no difference between a whore and a lady in their dress.” Therefore, by that logic, I am being a lady.

God, I hate periods. A week long torture fest where an unborn devil’s spawn is scraping off the lining of my uterus by raking nails against it. It’s as if it is taking vengeance for me not giving it a physical form. This is why I’ve never had baby fever.

Fuck Christianity. I’m expected to toil the earth and also bear born sinners?